I have always been very open and honest on this blog, because the main reason I even write is to share my story and my life with an audience/community. But I haven’t been keeping up lately, literally and figuratively. I’ve been stressed out, overwhelmed, and drowning in this season of my life.

I’ve discovered it’s possible to both sink and float at the same time, and that the things that cause you to fall under the surface of the water are also the things that keep you above it.

My puppy, Piper, is a sweet angel when I wake up in the morning and she cuddles on my shoulder, wanting only to lick my nose and have a belly rub. She makes me feel like my life is fantastic, because how many people get to wake up to four-pound puppy kisses?

And then, when she barks in the middle of the night or poops on the floor for the 18th time, I feel as if she’s given me more wrinkles than smiles and I am so far in over my head that surely I’ve made a mistake. 

My general dissatisfaction with my life has always existed despite every effort, and at the beginning of every school year I am determined to tackle it head on and find the happiness I seek from diving into a million new projects. This year, I am blessed with at least a dozen new friends, found at coffee shops, in class, and through my writing. And yet, because of my extra curricular work and commitments outside of school, I haven’t had time to organize my new apartment or even write for my personal blog.

My passion for writing has shown me the biggest blessings and clearest direction in my life, and I felt called to change my career path: I am now a double major in Creative Writing and Journalism. Clearly an opportunity to better myself and expand my network, this change and addition has also felt like two dead weights strapped to my ankles, along with my unending time and energy commitments.

I am so incredibly fortunate to have such positive things in my life (a loving puppy, new friends, and higher opportunities), and I am currently working on looking at them through that light – as well as just trying to juggle it all. My age often feels at least 20 years older than the number on my birth certificate, but it is through these new changes and different circumstances in this season of my life that I will grow and develop.

Thank you for always being my constant audience,

Madeleine