Man’s Best Friend

I have four dogs. And if you collected the amount of dog hair from under the couch, we could technically make it five dogs. Three of them weigh just around as much as I do, and the other one is a bit bigger than the average football.

Our dogs live a life of energetic bliss, not counting the small one. She is moody, sleeps half the day, and will eat a week-old Cheeto from underneath the fridge without any hesitation. She does what she wants.

But the other three, despite their constant hair regeneration and slobbering skills, are happier than a kid at a candy buffet. Every morning they wake up before dawn, much to our delight, and fly down the stairs at lightning speed, their paws thundering across the floor. Our alarms are consistent, and if we refuse to wake up and play with them immediately, our beds our invaded by furry monsters.

This is Cooper, our youngest and most rambunctious of the bunch.

Sometimes as I bang my head against the steering wheel in traffic, or fake-sob over my calculus homework, I wish that God had made me a dog. Life would be much simpler if I had four paws and a tail, and didn’t have to think about college applications or brushing my hair.

The longer I pondered why dogs are so much happier (and pretended I calculus didn’t exist) I came to five conclusions.

1. Dogs don’t care if it’s raining.

Dogs don’t even bat an eye at the dark looming clouds overhead, they only care about how many squirrels are in the yard at the moment, and how many are in catchable distance.

2. Dogs don’t take predictability to heart.

Even if they’ve never actually caught a squirrel in their entire life, they will continue to run in circles around the tree, at the slight chance that a miracle may occur and a breeze blow the squirrel to it’s fate below.

3. Dogs don’t keep track of time.

There’s never a set schedule in dog world, only breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And every other countless snack that their begging eyes force you to “accidentally drop”. Between napping, tearing up pillows, chasing squirrels, searching for fallen food, and following their owner around until their attention meter is full (which is rare), dogs just go with the flow. Their days mostly depend on living life with simplicity.

4.Dogs love unconditionally.

They are quick to forget the time you yelled at them for chewing up the $200 dollar pair of boots, or for eating the entire birthday cake off the counter. Dogs only remember how much they love you, and how much they love the fact that you slip pieces of chicken casserole under the table.

5. Dogs don’t overcomplicate things.

Stress is nonexistent in a world where the worst thing possible is taking a bath, or a trip to the vet. It doesn’t matter if the neighbor dog likes them, or if they were smartest one in their obedience class. They don’t think about how embarrassing it was to have an accident on the kitchen floor for the third time this week. Dogs just let their lives happen, without a second thought.

Somehow, Cooper and Rosie fell asleep in the absolute most adorable way ever.

I realized that dogs are everything that I am not, and God made me a worried-filled, rain-hating teenage girl for a reason. But, from the perspective of a dog’s eyes, I need to chill out. If my only care in the world was what brand of dog food I was going to eat for breakfast, life would be so much simpler, sunny, and carefree. Dogs are not only man’s best friend, they’re one of our wisest teachers.

Forever a dog person,

Maddie Rheinheimer

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